I know there are serveral ways of slicing and dicing up this topic, but I'm going to separate it into two meditations: gaps and nongaps (based on my own experiences).
The Gap
And no, I'm not talking about the clothing store.
I've surely have felt it among my friends, no matter how close I consider them to be. The time interval might be just for a week or even ten years or more. Nevertheless, there is that undescribable feeling that surges through your whole self as you see this person for the first time, in, whether it be a week or a decade. If you are like me, this feeling is rather uncomfortable. It's almost awkward to even be seeing each other again.
I always complain to a number of my friends, that I don't want to go this place or that place, because I'm bound to run into some annoying individual from the past. While I might have been able to tolerate them in my youthful days, it isn't so much the case now. There is that common courtesy of saying "Hi, how are you doing?" that is so masked by fakeness, when I do run into people. I always would think deep down to myself, "If I wanted you to know, wouldn't I have called you?... or vice versa..." Sure, they could have been busy because life moves at such a breakneck pace these days, but that's just me, a skeptic and cynic at heart, well, most of the times. And as I part ways by a hug or a handshake, out of formality, I am left wondering, "Well, that was pointless... chances are, I'm not going to see this person again nor is he/she going to call..." Sure, there's that curiousity factor. When one of my friends tells me that they saw so and so, I am bound to ask how they are doing, but it's only human to be curious.
Then there are those individuals that you wouldn't mind running into, as you wonder how they are; a former good friend, an old crush, or that special someone that made you laugh when you were down. For whatever reason (time, school, work), you aren't able to keep in contact and that relationship dissipates. But deep down in retrospect, you know that that relationship had that zest that made it standout among other relationships, maybe even to this day. It makes me wonder, what went wrong? Oh well...
Gaps can be good, especially when you want to get away from certain individual(s). Conversely, it can be kryptonite for those special relationships that you once had.
The Nongap
I'm lucky to have those few individuals in my life where this is evident, no matter what the circumstances may be, well so far that is. It just seems like whatever that may come between us, whether it be school, significant others, family, etc., a surprise visit or phone call seems to immediately gap that temporary distance. I have been thinking for longest on what it is about these relationships, where time and distance is not an issue, and well, all I have come up with is: chemistry
There are just some people you get along with. There is that mutual understanding, respect, and concern for one another, which I think, flourishes under chemistry. That's not to say that you only need chemistry, there are of course, other factors that I can't quite put my finger on. Although, in reflection, of all my current relationships, those that have sustained all have that chemistry factor in common.
Nongaps are great. I'm lucky to have a couple people in my life, where I feel no distance can be added, at least as corny as it sounds, spiritually. You know, when you can crack a lame joke and not feel stupid, yet that person will laugh at your stupidity, and you don't really care. So...
What do you call a cow with no legs?...
Ground beef!
Ha!... now that's what I'm talking about. Oh, come on, that was pretty funny. I know I know, I should stay in school. Oh well, just a thought...
http://www.myspace.com/msun/blog/213679260
